I have an emergency fund in the form of an ISA, and it does get used. It's for any vet bills, car repairs or as peace of mind if OH goes out of work. At the moment it is nil, but I am planning on putting £100 a month in starting soon.
We live comfortably on a household income of under £20k, but then we are happy to have one old banger of a car, never had a holiday in 15 years, and don't eat out, don't have take-aways and so on. But that is just our way, it's not a hardship. I'm hoping to earn more money this year and we are wanting a holiday, but the way I see it - if we can live happily on under £20k, and I can earn an extra £10k on top of that, essentially that is £10k spare to put toward a house perhaps? In theory, but it is easy to rise one's standard of living as the money rises and you still find yourself skint - I'm trying to be mindful of that.
On the topic of couples who split things down the middle - I knew of someone who did this with everything, even the chores, and if she did his chores she would charge him money for it!